Attract Your Life's Desires

Saturday, March 12, 2005

Colliding With Destiny

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Gina, a classmate in med school was back from Cebu for the past week. We started our IM residency on the same month and day but she has learned to love what I didn't and has surpassed the ugliest part of the 3 years training of one of the most toxic specialties in medicine. She has junior residents now and had the privilege to a one week leave. I am happy for her but I have no regrets. My move to shift specialties was one of the best decisions I made in my life. What I envied about Gina was the glow in her eyes. She never looked as radiant as she did. The most common etiology behind such aura I could think of, was a man. And dang I was right. My fellow hall of famer of our distinct org of single women found someone at long last. That pushed my panic button once again. Apocalypse is here. But then my greatest fear is not ending up alone, but settling for someone I don't love at all just because no one else is there and nothing else is happening.
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Instead of buying my mom a new microwave oven for her birthday, I busted my budget and bought a flat screen tv instead. But then it was worth it, I didn't expect to see her look that happy. Now my dad is jealous. He says he wants a tv just like that one, in jest. I told him, "uh, dad, I could've bought you a really grand present had they accepted me as part of the viva hot babes but since they discounted me as being too skinny, I had to settle being a doctor instead". Seriously, I don't know what to give to my dad. His birthday is up next. He can buy himself anything he fancies. Maybe a lifetime supply of Lipitor will make him happy. But gosh that's even more expensive than a wide screen tv.
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Belly dancing is addicting. While other doctors to go to their nursing classes after duty, I head to my belly dancing class. Why, it's a career alternative too. :) It's just that it isn't easy as it looks. The first day I attended the class I had to dive into my medicine bag the next day to look for Alaxan or any analgesic in sight. But having sore muscles on the abs area was the kind of pain that I welcomed. Our friends should watch Ning dance. She moves like a worm. Yeah, I dance like a worm too, only with edges. Modern dance class is more fun though, coz it's easier and feels like rehearsing for a starstruck production number (can't you tell, I have frustrations in life?). But I need belly dancing to improve my poise and form. When I told two of our clerks, Rowena and Melissa, my plans to sign up for the class, they countered, "but doc you don't need that, you don't have big abs" I explained that when your tummy levels up to your chest area , it isn't a very pretty sight. " They instantly retracted their words and blurted, "yeah you're right doc, maybe you need to get serious on belly dancing". Hehe! I love these girls' sense of humor.
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I watched Dr. Bertice Berry's lecture on vcd and several lines she said were worth quoting. Take this for instance, "When you walk walk with purpose, you collide with destiny". I lamented, "but I always walk with purpose!" My brother heard me and said, "destiny doesn't always have to come in the form of a tall, dark and handsome man, silly." Ouchies.

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On a more serious note, I realized that certain friendships are not worth keeping. No matter how you try to see the good in people, some may not be worth your understanding at all, especially when your acts of kindness only fuel their arrogance and beastly attitude. For me, that's about as hopeless as one could get.

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