It's My Party And I'll Curse If I Want To

I'm taking the time off from all the miseries that have engulfed me for the past few months. I just finished serving my one month pre-residency in Radiology and now awaiting further instructions. In the meantime I'll be taking a much needed vacation in Manila and seeing my friends again. I've just announced that I'd be arriving next week, to give them time to free their skeds. For the first time in several months, I'm actually excited about something again. It reminds me that I did have a life before I filled my world with gloom. Happiness is indeed a choice. Not always an easy one, though. Sometimes, one needs to exert extra effort to achieve it especially when faced with circumstances that test your resilience against defeat .

It's almost my birthday. I'm praying to have the wisdom and maturity to fight off all these self-defeating attitude. I pray for good health for myself and the people I love. I wish for sharpness of the mind to keep me focused on my work. I wish for peace, both inner and for the world. I wish to have the tenacity to keep me going through the rough times.Lastly, if it's not too much to ask, I wish people would stop taking pity on me just because I have nobody special in my life at this age and that they'd stop pairing me off with the next single guy they know coz honestly, most, if not all of their choices gross me out. God, I'm pissed off when they do that. They can do that to other single girls maybe, but not to me, please. It only adds insult to injury. My shaky self-esteem can't take it well yet. It further ties me down into my already clogged-up pity pot. I handle the situation calmly when inside I'm already screaming while simultaneously cursing them with words I'd rather not say here. They think they're doing you a favor by matching you off even when it's not obviously not welcome. That's the hardest part of being single, people try to fill the spot you reserved for your prince with knights in rusty armors and think you wouldn't notice the difference. Nobody has the right to tell me who and when to love. Luckily, my best buds don't do that to me. They know me too well to try that. Another thing that pisses me off are the guys who assume you're enjoying being paired off with them and that you're an easy prey and will take the bait just because you've been single for too long. Screw them.

Oh. Guess I just blew off steam there. Been keeping it down all this time. But I do hope I get my wishes for my birthday. It's not something too much to ask, is it?